BABY!!!!!!!!

It seems like the best possible outcome - birthdad is on board and wants to have contact with the baby. Oh, people, I don't even know what to say. I'm kind of in shock, but in the best possible way. My poor coworkers couldn't figure out, based on peeking at me through the glass door of my office, whether things had gone well, or really bad. They were funny when I came out. And they were wonderfully supportive (thanks VIP friends!!). Hubby is the calm one right now, which is kind of funny-unusual. He's calling his mom. I can't wait to hear how that goes. I called my mom and she cried with me. She posted it on FB I think as fast as I did.

So, now what? Well, the social worker is meeting with R tomorrow and will call me to set up a time when we can meet. I asked her about the baby's gender, which I haven't done up until now because I just wasn't ready to get that invested. Boy or girl - which do you think?????? I wish I knew!! She wouldn't tell me! Can you believe that??!!!!! She said it's R's news to give us, which I get, but geeeeeeeeeeeeeeez!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Also, a friend just now reminded me I have to start pumping to get ready for breastfeeding (sorry if that was too much info, but it is my blog so I get to write whatever I want). Oh my. I think it may have just hit me that this is real. Wow.

Today's lesson - there are moments when I may actually be struck speechless. This is totally one of them. Mark it down.