Monday, September 19, 2011

Weaning?

I've been asked several times recently, as we approach baby E's 1st birthday, if we're going to start weaning. The short answer is no. We're not. The medium answer is, we're going to go as long "as is mutually desired" as the CDC and WHO recommend, though really because that's what I want to do.

The long answer is this: I plan to nurse for at least 6 more months, and we'll go as long after that as I/we still have milk, and baby E wants to. I think another year would be fabulous. I can't even imagine weaning my baby now. He's just as much a baby today as he will be 2 weeks from now, after his 1st birthday. It makes no sense to me to wean him, just because he's a year old. It's not like he simply is no longer a baby that day. Also, it's not like - as a pediatrician unfortunately told someone I know last year - the benefits of breastfeeding and breastmilk simply stop just because a child hits that 365 day mark in life. Such an ignorant remark to make. The immunological benefits continue. The bonding benefits continue. The health benefits to mom (hello decreased risk of breast cancer?!) continue.

Baby E loves to nurse. When I get home in the evenings, regardless of when he's last eaten, he almost always wants to nurse within my first half hour home. He follows me around the house, whining, til I figure out that's what he's asking for. He grabs my finger and walks to the kitchen with me while I fill up the SNS, and then reclaims my finger and walks with me to the couch. Whining and giggling while I get settled, ready to nurse him. So, of course we will continue.

And, you know what? I love nursing baby E. I love the closeness of it. I love the snuggling. I love the way he stops, and grins up at me with this funny, drooly smile, used only when we're nursing. I love the contended sighs he utters. The way he pats my chest and wiggles with joy when he's done. I love that sometimes he stops and growls at me and we have our own little growling conversation, just the two of us. I love this world that's just me and my baby E. So, of course we continue.

We fortunately still have milk donors who also recognize the benefits of so-called "extended breastfeeding" (which, really, I think is a silly term, but whatev') and are willing to continue to give us milk. So of course we will continue to accept this liquid gold and use it to keep our baby so very healthy.

I don't know for sure when we will stop nursing. I hope it's not for a long time. But, it will be whenever baby E is ready to stop. He has decided when he is ready to meet all of his other developmental milestones. He will decide when he is ready to meet this one as well. Until then, we continue to nurse. And I'm thrilled about it.

I know some mommas at this point are more than ready to stop. They want their bodies back, they're tired of having babies attached to them all this time. But, really, they have 9 months more than I've had of having a baby attached to me. I missed out on that initial closeness, so I'm going to take advantage of the closeness on this end of it as long as baby E wants.

Today's lesson - "extended breastfeeding" is actually the norm around the world. Stopping at a year really makes no sense, unless it is what both momma and baby want. Absolutely, there are valid reasons women have for weaning at this time, or earlier, but the errant belief that there are no longer any benefits to baby shouldn't be one of them.

3 comments:

Lauren said...

Couldn't have said it any better! Someone should make a sign that all breastfeeding mamas can wear at her child's 1st birthday party that states exactly what you said followed by "stop asking me now, ok!" I love everything you mentioned about "extended breastfeeding," the closeness, the grunts, squeals, pats, even pinches...I dread the day mine weans himself...Great blog today! Thank you!

Emms said...

Great post! I read it while nursing Bug, who is 14 months :)

It's all about what's best for everyone!

Anonymous said...

I've been enjoying your blog, found it through world milksharing week. I am a mother of 2, birthmom of 1 (she turned 13 few days ago!). My kids are 5 and 20 months. I nursed dd to over 3, and ds and I still nurse, some days more than others. I have a wonderful relationship w/ my birthdaughter, my only regret was not getting to nurse her past our initial couple of days. Back then, I didn't even know to ask her mom to try using an SNS or induced lactation. I cringe at the thought of the formula she must have consumed...but today she is a happy, vivacious, outgoing gem. That was just one of the choices I had to make. I am fortunate to be surrounded by friends and sisters who also "extend" their breastfeeding... but now with my 'BIG' boy, I hesitate to nurse him too openly in public...though I know I'm not doing ANY nursing duos any favours that way, it's just my own comfort level... I think it's amazing that you can provide your son with a nursing relationship...if you lived near me (eastern ON) I'd supply you w/ milk too! (I've always had ample). Cheers.